Wordy Sentences

Wordy sentences can obscure your meaning. Aim for clear, direct sentences so readers can follow your ideas. (For more information on writing concise sentences—including a few techniques you may use in this exercise—see "Wordy Sentences.")

Revise each sentence below to make it less wordy. Since there are many ways to revise each sentence, your teacher may have you E-mail your work to classmates so you can compare revisions.

1 Professor Smith, who is a teacher in the Biology Department, won the Outstanding Teaching Award this semester.
2 In spite of the fact that they promised to finish repairs to my car by today, I’ll probably need to find a ride to the party this weekend.
3 There are various businesses around town that give substantial discounts to college students.
4 In my apartment I have the picture "Dogs Playing Poker," which is a classic.
5 I suspect that the field hockey squad, which is the most successful team at this university, will begin getting more money for scholarships soon.
6 I am still using a laptop computer that is about five years old.
7 In Palmquist’s research it was found that faculty members need plenty of time to become comfortable teaching in a computer classroom.
8 I was unable to complete my assignment due to the fact that the campus E-mail server crashed for about three hours last night.
9 I am reading through the chapters in a very quick manner.
10 In today’s society, there are many students who can keep in touch with their parents via E-mail.

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